I Called You
As I looked down a dark path recently I turned around, looked at God and said, “Are you serious God?” To which He said, “Yes.” I glanced down the familiar and dark path again, and then back at God and said, “Really God, REALLY?” To which He said, “I called you.” I glanced down one more time, and looked back one more time. Then I screamed, “Are you KIDDING me God?” To which He said, “You are the only one. I prepared you for this. I need you to go.” And, so I’m going.
Where is it I am going? Well, I’m going on a walk. But, not a physical walk. This is a spiritual walk. This is a walk that involves taking someone’s hand, and walking beside them. It involves listening to their pain, speaking God’s truth, and just sitting there in the silent darkness when everything and everyone else has gone away.
Even though it is dark, I recognize this path. This is a walk I’m familiar with. I’ve walked here with many others many times. And frankly others have walked here with me. Some may think it is scary to walk in the darkness, but I am not afraid. I’ve realized there is a lot of light in the darkness. And the beauty discovered in the dark light is truly indescribable.
The Bible verse that my Pastor choose for me when I was confirmed, is Psalm 27:1. Even though I haven’t always been a Christian, I have clung to this verse since it was presented to me in ninth grade. It says, "The Lord is my light and my salvation; I will fear no one. The Lord protects me from all danger; I will never be afraid." On January 24, 2002 I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. On that day I gave Him my life completely and asked him to direct my footsteps. Over the past seven years God has truly lit my path. No matter how dark the path is I’m walking down, our Lord lights my path.
Over the past years, I’ve walked in the light and in the dark. Amazingly enough, both paths have had their bumps and bruises. But, I can honestly say that when I look back, the dark paths are my favorites.
The dark paths are where I’ve had the privilege of walking with people through things like relationship struggles, unemployment, divorce, negative thinking, childhood wounds, alcoholism, depression, and abuse. It is during these walks when I find myself completely relying on God to speak the next word or move my foot to the next step because I can not do it on my own strength. It is during this time when I can get out of my own way and allow myself to completely surrender to God. And, only when I am completely surrendered to God is when He can mold me into His image and likeness as it says in Genesis 1.
As tough as it is to voluntarily walk down a dark path, I’d choose it again and again. Shortly after I became a Christian, I heard a sermon by Todd Phillips who talked about how passion is the sufferings of Christ between the night of the last supper and His death. We usually think about passion as an emotion, but it is really about being involved in the sufferings. Jesus walked with people through their sufferings. To be like Him, I must do the same. It is for this reason that Philippians 3:10 has truly been the cry of my heart for the past seven years. In it Paul says, “I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death.” This is the verse that enables me to step into the darkness with others and be a friend "who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words (unknown author)". As I take a step forward into the darkness today, I feel it is an honor to be called again.
